Spreading Myself Thin

I've been looking for a job unsuccessfully in San Jose since I got back from Korea in mid-December, so I widened my search to include the whole San Francisco Bay area.

But in the meantime, a friend from Korea asked me to go to Dubai, and I've wanted to try living there since I worked at Samsung C&T (which was the main contractor on the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building in the world). So I'm also looking for a job in Dubai. Turns out I have more connections in the UAE than in the US. Funny how life works.

And, of course, I'm still trying to get back to Korea doing anything but teaching English. I really miss Seoul and all my friends there, and I miss the culture and food and everything but the weather, really.

I realized through all of this that I don't like living in my home country.

Where to Work?

San Jose is a global city. It feels small but don't be fooled- there are brilliant people from all over the world gathered here in Silicon Valley. And there are a lot of job seekers and not enough jobs for all of us. Happy New Year everyone, from an unemployed, soon to be homeless, Kristin.

But don't worry! I will get back on my feet! Speaking of feet, I was walking to a mall that's about a 40 minute walk from my current place the other day and I smelled something familiar. The stench of rotting ginko under my feet brought me back to the streets of Seoul in the fall and early winter. I never thought I'd close my eyes and take that in as a pleasant fragrance, but I did. I stopped in my tracks on the sidewalk and sucked the stench into my nostrils and was transported to my walk to the subway station from my studio apartment in Gangnam (Yeoksam). I remembered the crowded subway line number 2 and the station two stops away (Samseong) where I worked in Trade Tower above COEX mall. I remembered how in the summer my life was right on track: a great boyfriend, a great apartment, a great job, great friends, walking distance to great salsa clubs.... What happened? Life happened.

Reverse Culture Shock and Reminiscences

Now that I've been back in the US for a few weeks, there are some things I've noticed about myself, about my country, and about Korea that I had taken for granted. It still aches to think about what I've left behind and I still feel my future is a black hole. It's like my ribs are made of rubber and every time I breathe my lungs and heart bend them backwards to try to escape from my body. I scream with no sound alone in my room and sob myself to sleep silently. I am homesick for a country that was never mine and a family with which I share no blood. But it's not all bad. I'm breaking the barrier between the present and the future with baby steps, and eventually I'll get my training wheels off and ride forward on my own again.

Name Change: No More Kristin's Korean Life

Yes folks, that's right. I've made it back to the US. I'm now in Silicon Valley, which is like a country of it's own.

I have already passed the written driver's test with flying colors and failed the behind-the-wheel test with a jerk of a tester, and I've found the bus stop that takes me to downtown San Jose, where I might get a job.

I have discovered the ups and downs of house sharing. I live with my brother, his girlfriend, a gay guy, and two straight guys. There's an Austrian girl coming in January so I'll either be kicked out or I'll be her roommate.

I have made a bank account with Bank of America and am scared of their overdraft fees.

I have a funny accent.

Welcome home, me. Welcome home.

I wish I were still in Korea.

The Future is a Black Hole Full of Promise

Will the job searching never end??
First I was job searching in Korea from January to March, then again from August to November, and now I've been job searching online for jobs in the South Bay area for about a month. I'm right where I started- nowhere!

The future is a black hole waiting to swallow me up and the next step I take will define what's on the other side. I hope it's not angry aliens. Ha!